Submission is a concept that has existed in human relationships and societies for centuries. It generally refers to the willingness of an individual to yield to the authority, influence, or control of another. In many cultures, submission is linked to discipline, respect, and social order, while in other contexts it can raise concerns about inequality and the loss of personal freedom. To truly understand submission, we need to look at its role in relationships, leadership, and society.
One important reason submission exists in human societies is that it helps maintain order and structure within relationships and institutions. When individuals recognize authority and follow guidance willingly, cooperation becomes easier and conflicts are reduced. For example, at schools, students submit to the authority of teachers so that learning can take place in an organized way. Similarly, in workplaces or communities, submission to leadership allows decisions to be carried out effectively, preventing confusion and encouraging harmony. In this way, submission can contribute to stability and smooth functioning in society.
However, an important question arises: is this social order created by submission truly fair to women? In many societies, the expectation that women must submit especially to male authority can put them at a disadvantage. Such expectations can limit women’s ability to defend themselves or speak up against unfair treatment. A recent personal experience from my time at the University of Uyo illustrates this clearly. During an exam, my friends and I arrived early and reserved our preferred seats. After stepping outside briefly, we returned to find a male student sitting in one of our spots. When my friend politely told him the seat belonged to us, he refused to move and even threatened her. In the heat of the moment, she stood her ground and said boldly in our local expression, “If them born you well, try am.” Later, when a video of the incident circulated in our department’s group chat, several male students criticized her reaction. Instead of holding the man accountable, they said she shouldn’t have confronted him because he was a man. This shows how society often expects women to remain submissive, even when facing intimidation or injustice, raising serious questions about whether submission truly encourages harmony or simply reinforces unequal power.
Submission has long been celebrated as a virtue that preserves order and harmony in society. Yet in practice, this expectation often falls more heavily on women, turning respect into quiet endurance. The incident at the University of Uyo highlights this contradiction,
when confronted with intimidation, women are expected to step back, rather than challenge wrongdoing. Society often tells women to wear the fabric of submission soft, quiet, and accommodating. But what happens when that fabric does not fit? What happens when the person expected to wear it feels suffocated by its seams? What if my skin is not made for submission at all, but for resistance for standing upright in the face of unfairness? Perhaps the real problem is not rebellion, but the discomfort society feels when women refuse to fold themselves into silence. A just society cannot demand submission at the cost of dignity. It must instead be built on fairness, mutual respect, and the recognition that every individual man or woman has the right to defend their space, their voice, and their humanity.